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Report: Majority of gym workout spent untangling headphone wires

Unravelling tangled headphone cords accounts for 56% of the time taken up during gym workouts, a new health study has found. Researchers at Cambridge University also found unnecessarily long recovery drink breaks made up…

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Your stars: Leo

See a penny pick it up, all day long you’ll have good luck. That’s good advice. But if the aforementioned penny is in the fast lane of the M1, or in front of…

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Your stars: Cancer

The crab in you will start to feel left out of things when friends don’t involve you in their plans. Just be patient. There will be a reason. Possibly that they are tired…

Yum! A bun of death

Health researchers successfully extract pleasure from eating

Health experts have found conclusive evidence that a diet heavy in red meat such as bacon sandwiches with extra crispy fat is bad for you, for the 178th time this year. Researchers at…

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Your stars: Gemini

Be prepared for trouble towards the end of the week involving a car tyre, either attached to a car or flying solo. If you don’t have a car you may lose the sole…

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Your stars: Taurus

Being a bull has served you well in the past. It’s a fine macho sign. Much better than a Virgo, which is really quite embarrassing. I wouldn’t want to be a fish either,…

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Your stars: Aries

A woman called Bridget will have an exciting proposition for you this week but, unless your name is Jeff, have nothing to do with it. Your windows have been getting on your nerves…

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Your stars: Pisces

A new love will come on the scene this week, which is bad news for your partner. Never mind, eh? Change is as good as a rest. Don’t be tempted to tell any…

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Your stars: Aquarius

Work colleagues will be more supportive than usual and you will begin to feel happier about opening up to them about the issues affecting you and your problems. Don’t, though. Knowledge is power…

Raspberry Pi: One size fits all

Raspberry Pi kids looking forward to having heads flushed down school toilet

A new generation of IT programmers were today preparing for their first testicle-crushing wedgie as the Raspberry Pi computer went on sale today. Bullies from across the UK were readying themselves for an…

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