Labour leader Ed Miliband will have a minor operation on his scrotum to make him more electable following successful surgery on his nose.
Spin doctors claim Miliband’s operation is a vasectomy requested by wife Justine who is desperate for a decent night’s sleep.
But a source told The News Grind that Ed is keen to correct a lean to the left which is making him unpalatable to the voting public.
A small implant will enable Ed to move to the centre ground.
The operation is part of an elaborate scheme of improvements by Labour Party officials looking to create Ed Milband 2.0.
The first act in Miliband’s transformation was a nose transplant.
Some mischevious Labour insiders wanted to graft Frank Skinner’s nose onto the leader.
But Miliband received the most electable bugle in Labour history – that of former Prime Minister Tony Blair.
It has given the Opposition leader the ability to sniff out a bandwagon from one hundred paces, according to reports.