Clarkson will be encouraged to stand as a Conservative candidate in the forthcoming Barnsley by-election. If he captures the traditional Labour stronghold he will be fast-tracked into the cabinet with a brief to ‘kick some arse’ on the international stage.
The safely controversial TV presenter said: “I am a very patriotic person so if I was asked to serve The Queen I will. Just stick me in a Challenger II tank and point me at Mexico.”
William Hague is being credited with the idea of bringing Clarkson into government.
The current foreign secretary, 22, is desperate for a return to the backbenches so that he can start earning some serious money again.
Hague believes that fellow Yorkshireman Clarkson would give the cabinet some real balls at a time when many ministers are starting to wobble over severe spending cuts after realising they are a very stupid idea.
Clarkson, who is a walking embodiement of the Daily Mail, would be a popular choice with grassroots Tories.
Lifelong Tory voter Fred Snell of Moss Side, Manchester, said: “I admire Clarkson’s stance on Mexicans. They are a cruel race.”
Betty Small, a full-time jam-maker from Horsham, Sussex, said: “Mr Clarkson has an old fighter jet in his garden. Not even Sadam Hussein could say that.
“He’s also well fit. He’d be welcome in my sadomasochistic love dungeon any time.”