Photo by presna420, some rights reserved
Drug dealers were reporting a huge rise in sales last night after being inundated by middle class dads trying to cash in on a US charity’s money for sterilisation programme.
The illegal sale of crack and heroin has rocketed since US charity group Project Prevention offered £200 and a free vasectomy to anyone who can prove they are a drug addict.
“It’s too good an offer to turn down,” said 42-year-old Glasgow dad-of-two Lee McGeechan, after scoring an three ounce bag of smack. “If I can get myself hooked by the weekend I can get that vasectomy the wife’s been harping on about and pocket £200. Jobs a good ‘un.”
Leeds dad Paul Whelan expressed concern at the plan which has seen Project Prevention pay 3,242 drug users £200 since it launched in 1997.
He said: “Just how addicted do you have to be? Can I get it for my recreational cocaine habit or do I have to be a fully-fledged smackhead? They should make their policy a lot clearer, if they want more dads to take up their offer.”
Drug dealers in Salford, Greater Manchester, were forced to limit the amount of mind altering Class A substances to keep up with the demand from middle class dads.
One dealer who refused to be named told The News Grind they were struggling in the wake of the Project Prevention offer.
“Normally these dads are dabbling in a bit of puff or a bag of speed for the weekend,” he said. “But with a free vasectomy on the table and £200 they’re clamouring for the hard stuff.
“We’re limiting them to a wrap of coke and an ounce of smack each, with priority going to dads with four or more kids.”
A spokesman for Project Prevention said the organisation was not entirely happy with the development and admitted the high volume of clients meant they were having to rethink their vasectomy policy.
“Instead of the intricate medical procedure normally used to render the testicles useless,” the spokesman said. “We will just have to revert to the tried and tested two bricks and a firm hand approach. Primitive and painful yes, but the results are just as satisfying.”
> Photo by presna420, some rights reserved
