It’s the final day of the January transfer window and understandably, the gossip columns have exploded in a sticky orgy of gossip, speculation and bullshit.
Despite being otherwise engaged today, Harry Redknapp is widely expected to be busy in the transfer market today. Hugo Rodallega from Wigan and Mario Marin from Werder Bremen could come in, while Roman Pavlyuchenko and Vedran Corluka could both be on their way out of Tottenham Hotspur.
Presumably Sky Sports News have special permission to film Harry’s traditional car-window transfer update interview from the dock at Southwark Crown Court.
Spurs are also linked with 3 new mystery players; Rover74, Tyson24 and MrSnuggles00.
Meanwhile, up North, Sunderland are set to bring in Wayne Bridge from Manchester City. The move looks set to have knock on benefits for the local economy.
The stallholders at Jacky White’s indoor market in Sunderland are delighted at the news that Bridge’s girlfriend, Frankie from The Saturdays, could become their newest customer.
Frankie said: “I’m desperate for a new place to shop, and need new hoover bags and AA batteries, so Wayne’s move makes perfect sense.”
Finally, in news that the Daily Stir would love to say was made up, ex-Liverpool striker Robbie Fowler has been signed for Kolkata by former Sunderland boss Peter Reid for £337,000. Other players signed in the auction included Hernan Crespo, Jay-Jay Okocha, Fabio Cannavaro and Robert Pires.
The motivation behind Fowler’s move is uncl£ar, but according to Wikipedia, Fowler was a boyhood Kolkatta fan, and would spend hours trawling the newspapers for a mention of his favourite curry.
Heard a transfer rumour? Email the Daily Stir and tell us about it so we can add it to our list of shit-stirring gossip direct from the imagination of bored hacks.