X Factor Gamu axe sparks UK meltdown
Looting, fires, and mass rioting swept across the UK today as the Gamu X Factor axe incident escalated out of control, sources in every major city have reported. All semblance of law and…
EXCLUSIVE: Broadmoor’s got the X Factor
Simon Cowell has taken the X Factor auditions to Broadmoor Hospital in a bid to unearth more ‘hilarious mentals,’ The News Grind can exclusively reveal. The long-running ITV series has a proud history…
Cheryl Cole to splash £1.5m on Geordie theme wedding
Brave malaria battler Cheryl Cole is to marry straight dancer Derek Hough in Los Angeles. And they will spare no expense to recreate the pee-stained romance of the pop star’s home town, Newcastle….
N-Dubz star Dappy’s fury as Pakistania charity single is ditched
Plans to release a charity record in aid of the Pakistan flood victims have been scrapped – after an appeal by over four million Pakistani flood victims, writes Nigel Eels. The single,…
Labour leadership election cancelled due to lack of interest
The labour leadership campaign is set to be cancelled after a lack of interest – from the candidates. A hustings event had been arranged last Saturday night at the Neil Kinnock Community Centre…
Sick Cheryl Cole ‘Pringles pervert’ fantasist jailed
A fantasist who wrote perverted letters detailing his sordid fantasies to chav princess Cheryl Cole has been jailed. And we’ve acquired the vile scribblings of a man dubbed the ‘Pringles pervert’ by unimaginative…
