Facebook users urge Facebook not to be too hasty in tackling porn virus attack
Facebook users have told the social networking site that there’s no need to rush into any investigation into reports that pornographic images have been posted throughout its website. Pictures of hardcore pornography have…
Facebook to relaunch as quarterly magazine
Social media giant Facebook will stay ahead of the curve by ditching its digital offering to relaunch as a printed magazine. The plan is to convert the majority of the service’s estimated 700m…
‘Facebook fatigue’ mainly affects men’s wrists
Despite denials from the social media giant, Facebook fatigue is real – and it’s caused by over-enthusiastically viewing pictures of your partner’s sexy friends. Rigorous examination of images of MILFs – and in…
Inaugural Twat’s Dictionary launched
The world’s first Twat’s Dictionary hits shops today, promising an in-depth guide to words and phrases used exclusively by twats, or by non-twats acting twattily, writes Hard Jackson. The dictionary has been compiled…
Matt Cardle Christmas number one ‘better than four minutes of silence’
X Factor musical genius Matt Cardle claimed the Christmas number one spot, proving his debut single is better than nothing – literally. Cardle sold 493,000 copies of When We Collide, a cover version…
Facebook buys aircraft carrier as Cold War with Google escalates
In a move that has alarmed sovereign Western states, Facebook is understood to have purchased an aircraft carrier from Russia, writes Hard Jackson. The Admiral Kuznetsov class multirole aircraft carrier Zaroff has been…
Facebook adds ‘We Are Amused’ button support
Facebook has bowed to pressure from Buckingham Palace to include We Are Amused button support for the exclusive use of newest member The Queen, writes Jonathan Rayner. According to Palace etiquette the monarch…
Apple chief Steve Jobs overjoyed with crap iPhone application
Apple today unveiled a new iPhone application that lets the world know when you’re having a shit, writes Crispin Fisher. The innovative iPoo iPhone app sends texts to all your contacts and automatic…
Callous bitch dumps grass cuttings in a wheelie bin
Everyone in the world was united in disgust last night as a woman shamelessly dumped some grass cuttings in a wheelie bin, writes Harry Hull. The senseless act followed the woman’s decision to…
OMG! Nobody likes HR woman’s Facebook comments
Human Resources manager Ruth Pilkington was celebrating yesterday after her 42,000th consecutive Facebook message failed to attract a single comment or indication that anyone liked what she had said, writes Nigel Eels. The…
