Liverpool and Manchester United reject new referee whistle
Moves to introduce a party blower-style referee’s whistle to defuse Premier League flashpoints have been rejected. The new whistle – which produces a shrill raspberry sound while unfurling up to 12 inches and…
Liverpool and Arsenal linked with unspecified £25m star
Liverpool and Arsenal could be poised to make several new signings, according to rumours made up to trick you into clicking on this article. Liverpool are said to be battling Everton for the…
Alex Ferguson overheard banning Michael Owen from Manchester United training
Alex Ferguson has banned Michael Owen from training after he asked him if ‘Giggsy was alright’. The former England centre foward was told to immediately leave the Carrington complex following the question about…
Manchester City to expand Eastlands with 28,487 extra empty seats
Manchester City will gear up for their Champions League campaign by adding almost 30,000 seats – all of them empty – to their ground. The move will ensure City’s new capacity of 76,213…
Liverpool’s new blue home shirt leaked
Liverpool Football Club’s new home shirt has left Anfield chiefs red-faced – it’s blue, just like arch-rivals Everton’s. Manchester United and Manchester City are among a host of top teams who are also…
Wayne Rooney is new face of Buckfast
Manchester United striker Wayne Rooney has bounced back after losing his Coca Cola sponsorship deal by becoming the new face of Scottish national drink Buckfast. The England star was dropped by the makers…
Sir Alex Ferguson uses robot to overcome touchline ban
Manchester United manager Sir Alex Ferguson is to use a state-of-the-art robot to get around his five-match touchline ban, writes Crispin Fisher. Students at Manchester University are currently working with Fergie showing him…
Jesus had David Beckham tattoo
Scientists investigating the Turin Shroud have found an outline of David Beckham. They believe that Jesus may have had the tattoo of the LA Galaxy footballer on his chest just weeks before he…
Manchester United in late bid for Olympic stadium
Manchester United chiefs want to take over London’s Olympic stadium and move the team closer to its loyal fans, writes Crispin Fisher. Old Trafford bosses say they have ten times more fans in…
New device drowns out whine of Liverpool fans
An invention which cancels out the noise of whining Scousers will be rushed into pubs, offices and football stadiums across the UK. The device was created by scientists working on a gadget to…
