"newcastle" tag
Geordie Shore: If it gets really cold they wear knickers

Blizzard warning forces Geordie girls to apply extra layer of fake tan

North East women have reacted to a Met office storm warning today by spraying on an extra layer of fake tan to keep out the cold. With temperatures in some areas of Newcastle…

UN resolution could loosen tyrant Ashley’s grip on Newcastle United

NATO forces could strike to end Colonel Mike Ashley’s reign of terror at Newcastle United. A UN resolution has been passed to protect the Geordie Nation from abuses by the tyrant – and…

Barton sentenced to three years in The Championship

Former Newcastle United star Joey Barton has been sentenced to serve three years in the second tier of English football. But Barton will be thrilled to have escaped St James’s Park where the…

Joey Barton now has more Twitter followers than brain cells

Newcastle United’s unofficial spokesman on Twitter, Joey Barton, is closing in on another landmark by reaching nearly 300,000 followers on the social networking site. That’s more followers than he has brain cells, according…

Stoke City close in on anyone who has never been to Stoke

Stoke City will sign Newcastle’s Joey Barton, Nicklas Bendtner from Arsenal or anyone who has never had the misfortune to visit Stoke. The Potters have money to spend following their European qualification, and…

Joey Barton latest: Newcastle United rethink sign-a-lunatic transfer policy

Toon boss Alan Pardew fears Newcastle United may be forced to start a season without a recognised idiot in the side for the first time in decades. “Losing a Grade A fruitcake like…

Photo by Paul Robertson, some rights reserved

Newcastle owner Mike Ashley running out of things to sell off

Newcastle United owner Mike Ashley has sold off Peter Beardsley. The former billionaire is running out of things to offload as he continues to cash-in on the North East club. He sold star…

Kevin Nolan sorry for wishing Andy Carroll a merry Christmas

Newcastle United skipper Kevin Nolan has apologised to the club’s fans for his upbeat remarks late last year wishing friends, relatives and Andy Carroll a merry Christmas. The Toon player’s latest gaffe emerged…

Sunderland new boy Miliband refusing to play on left wing

New Sunderland signing David Miliband has given boss Steve Bruce a major headache ahead of Sunday’s derby clash with Newcastle. The failed Labour leadership candidate will make his debut in a position slightly…

Spurs lure Andy Carroll with bareknuckle prize

Newcastle United striker Andy Carroll looks set to join Tottenham after being promised big money for every team-mates’ jaw he smashes. The News Grind also understands that Spurs have offered Carroll a new…

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