Legoland recreates Raoul Moat stand-off – FIRST PHOTO
Bosses at Legoland, Windsor, have responded swiftly to criticism that their park is not as good as Raoul Moat’s funeral by setting up a Raoul Moat scene, complete with firing tasers. And there…
Great news: Banks are making billions
There were impromptu street parties on council house estates across the UK today after a second major bank announced seven-figure profits. Not since the marriage of Lady Diana and Prince Charles has the…
Raoul Moat’s face found on Greggs pasty
Thousands are flocking to a bakery in Newcastle after the face of killer gunman Raoul Moat appeared on a pasty. The ‘miracle’ was discovered on a freshly baked meat and potato lunchtime special…
Gazza was lined up to be WMD in Moat doomsday scenario
Former footballer Paul Gascoigne, fitted with a nuclear warhead with the killing power of six Hiroshimas, was part of a Northumbria Police doomsday scenario in the hunt for crazed gunman Raoul Moat, writes…
Moat – are vowels to blame?
Gunman Raoul Moat may have launched a bloody spree after overdosing on vowels, writes Nigel Eels. Experts now believe the key to why he could have flipped may lie in his name. Last…
Stupid fat people in hiding after Moat warning
Stupid fat people have gone into hiding after police revealed suspected gunman Raoul Moat was targeting “the wider public.” Lard-arsed muppets in the North East of England are understood to have almost choked…
