Pippa Middleton-induced erection finally subsides
Prince Harry has finally lost his around-the-clock erection – nearly two months after getting a close-up of Pippa Middleton’s arse at his brother’s wedding. The Royal lad about town was left with a…
Public demands to see photos of Pippa Middleton’s body
David Cameron is refusing to publish photographs of Pippa Middleton’s body for fear they could cause ‘untold chaos’. Calls are mounting for the images to be released amid claims the royal bridesmaid’s shapely…
Bank Holiday Tuesday declared as everyone has forgotten work login details
Bank Holiday Monday is to be followed by Bank Holiday Tuesday amid fears every worker in Britain has forgotten how to log in to their work computers. It is also believed up to…
Princess Beatrice unveiled as fifth Teletubby
This exclusive photo shows Princess Beatrice in her new role as the fifth Teletubby, sporting the fascinator she wore at the royal wedding of Prince William and Kate Middleton. The 22-year-old’s headpiece –…
Royal wedding: 89% of Americans believe event was real
Americans have swallowed wholesale an elaborate hoax designed to attract them to the UK and inject millions into Britain’s ailing economy. A fake royal wedding, complete with a cast of thousands of extras…
Royal Wedding alert: Kate Middleton in Declan Donnelly’s sights
TV star Declan Donnelly is so besotted with Kate Middleton that he plans to woo Prince William’s bride-to-be with an audacious royal wedding stunt, writes Crispin Fisher. News of Dec’s scheme – which…
Playboy secures TV rights to consummation of Kate and William’s marriage
TV rights to screen the consummation of Kate Middleton and Prince William’s marriage has been won by the Playboy TV adult channel, it was revealed today. “It’s a fantastic coup for the company…
Kate Middleton’s Aston Villa wedding lingerie for William revealed
It looks like someone will go down in an Aston Villa kit this year afterall. Royal bride-to-be Kate Middleton has revealed she’ll thrill Prince William by sporting saucy Villians lingerie on their wedding…
Swan Vesta launch combustible Kate Middleton and William effigies
Matchmakers Swan Vesta have come under fire after launching a range of explosive Kate Middleton and William action figures for the Royal Wedding. Critics claim the combustible souvenirs are being aimed at the…
Kate’s Royal Wedding nerves eased by surprise execution of boyfriends
Prince William has helped soothe his bride’s pre-wedding jitters by presiding over the execution of all of Kate Middleton’s previous boyfriends. Invoking The Treasons Act of 1534, known in royal circles as Henry’s…
