X Factor viewing figures dented by fact it’s shit
Four million fewer viewers tuned in to watch Little Mix win the X Factor, compared to the show’s 2010 finale. But that still means over 15m ‘people’ watched the off-centre faces of the…
X Factor Cowell launches court TV show Britain’s Got Feral Underclass
X Factor mogul Simon Cowell has secured the TV rights to air court cases in the UK and will launch with the show Britain’s Got Feral Underclass early next year. Geordie duo Ant…
X Factor’s Gary Barlow having personality injections
The man tipped as Simon Cowell’s UK X Factor replacement, Gary Barlow, is undergoing ground-breaking treatment to give him a personality. The Take That star is receiving injections that will alter chemicals in…
Simon Cowell’s new show ‘too complex for America’
X Factor supremo Simon Cowell’s new show has been branded too high brow for the American audience. Red or Black, which will be hosted by Ant and Dec, will give seven morons a…
Swan Vesta launch combustible Kate Middleton and William effigies
Matchmakers Swan Vesta have come under fire after launching a range of explosive Kate Middleton and William action figures for the Royal Wedding. Critics claim the combustible souvenirs are being aimed at the…
‘Ringo’ minister fights to demolish Simon Cowell’s old home
Housing Minister Grant Shapps has stepped up his fight to preserve the UK’s cultural heritage by demanding the destruction of X Factor judge Simon Cowell’s childhood home. After calling on Liverpool City Council…
Daily Mail fury over raunchy X Factor images causes more raunchy X Factor images in Daily Mail
The Daily Mail has launched an astonishing attack on the Daily Mail after it continued to print lewd images of X Factor stars Rihanna and Christina Aguilera. After calling on the media watchdog…
Painter and decorator takes year out
Matt Cardle, a painter and decorator from Essex, is taking a break from his day job to enjoy up to twelve months as a professional singer. Cardle, 27, won this year’s X Factor,…
US believed Cheryl Cole’s Geordie accent posed terrorist threat
The latest Wikileaks revelations show US intelligence agents feared Cheryl Cole’s Geordie accent posed a credible threat to national security, writes Crispin Fisher. CIA staff spent months decoding some of the X Factor…
X Factor reject Wagner is Cheryl’s dad
Cheryl Cole is in a state of shock after learning that eccentric former X Factor contestant Wagner is her biological father, writes Crispin Fisher. The discovery came to light when police carried out…
